Joy and pain
From the millions of love songs in circulation, it seems that a romantic relationship’s bed of roses can quickly sprout a few sharp thorns. Sometimes that happens even before the relationship really begins. Little, nagging love issues that could possibly sink your love titanic, are what we’ll be referring to as setbacks to fail or setups to succeed in a romantic relationship. Depending on how well you put your mind and heart into them, these delicate topics could either serve you as setbacks to fail or setups to succeed in your pursuit of happiness. Do you believe in love?
What you’ll be reading in this article is a collective wealth of research-backed findings, compiled recently in the desperate attempt for humankind to find its perfect companion, something that has always seemed out of reach, or is it? Here are the top 3 setbacks to fail or setups to succeed in your relationships.
Choosing your love partner
According to relationships author, Aaron Ben-Zeev, Ph.D., former University of Haifa President and Professor of Philosophy, we are increasingly getting it all wrong when searching for a soul mate. While you’d think that having a checklist of suitable qualities you’d want in your love interest would favor your chances of meeting your dream partner, it could very well serve as your ticket to being single. Probably for the better part of your life. His notion seeks to make people aware that being human, means having a few weaknesses here, and a few strengths there. That no one person might ever fit your full list of ideal personal values is a wakeup call. Instead, you’d be better off letting the feeling of connection between both of you help you in determining whether they’d make you happy, which would make one wonder if love, at first sight, is still a possibility.
Power plays
Something happened in the 1950s that continues to spark hot emotions to this very day – women empowerment. While a “man’s place” was in the business meeting, his lady’s was in being a housewife. The woman, who kept the home clean as a whistle, cooked and served the family warm meals, and was always there to receive her husband of many years when he returned home from work. The men would, in turn, be the providers. The ones to bring home the ‘bacon’ and pull out the chairs for their lady to sit.
The man was the head of the home then, but that changed; competition set in. Nowadays, there are many more women C.E.Os than there’s ever been, and more men are helping out with changing diapers. At the heart of these social advancements, however, something else cropped up, large numbers of singles, divorce cases, and widespread promiscuity. Reports show power issues, or control issues, are the number two romantic relationships killers across the globe, after money matters. The same reports indicate that women still long for the dominant male and most men wish their girlfriends were more submissive. But you will agree that it takes a certain kind of man, or woman, to be submissive to.
Talking it all out
The importance of communicating well and regularly in your relationship can never be overly emphasized. Though money issues have been confirmed as the number one relationships killer, it is the lack of proper communication that dissolves most relationships. A build-up of unspoken, negative feelings leads to resentment. And the last thing you want to do is make love to the person you resent, which usually happens subconsciously. Occasional, small fights are actually healthy in a romantic relationship, but how the two of you choose to solve the thorny issues could turn out to be your setbacks to fail or setups to succeed. Additionally, according to writer and former FBI Counterintelligence Agent, Joe Navarro, learning to spot a few important nonverbal communications and body language hints could be part of the setup you need to succeed in your romantic relationships.