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August 16, 2021 — 20:01 PM
If you’ve ever felt you had a keen awareness of the emotions of those around you, there’s a decent chance you could be an empath. You’ve probably heard the term before—but what does it actually mean? Here, we break down everything you need to know about empaths, from common traits to pros and cons, and how these people fare in relationships.
What it means to be an empath.
An empath is someone who is highly attuned to the energy and emotions around them, whether that energy is coming from individuals, groups, or even physical spaces, professional intuitive and author of Self-Care for EmpathsTanya Carroll Richardson tells mbg.
The term is derived from the word empathy, which is the ability to understand and share the emotions of another. So an empath, as you might imagine, is someone who takes empathy beyond what most people experience. They are so attuned, in fact, that without proper boundaries, they can absorb others’ energy (which can be quite overwhelming).
As psychiatrist and author of The Empath’s Survival GuideJudith Orloff, M.D., previously explained to mbg, empaths are also sensitive, loving, and have finely tuned intuition—but can become “an emotional and physical sponge, absorbing the negativity and stress of the world.”
Clairsentience is the most common of the four “clairs” of intuition, with messages coming through as feelings, Richardson says. In the case of empaths, “they’re are naturally strong in the clairsentient or feeling psychic pathway.”
2. You embody another type of “clair.”
Richardson adds that while clairsentience is the most common type of intuition for an empath to embody, it’s not unheard of for them to experience other clairs, such as clairaudience (messages that come through as words, almost like talking), clairvoyance (messages that come through mental images), or claircognizance (when messages come as instantaneous insight or “downloads”).
3. You often feel overly stimulated.
Because empaths are constantly bombarded with the energy around them, they can often feel overly stimulated, Richardson says. Even in a setting that’s seemingly calm, one person’s negative energy could completely throw you off if it enters your bubble.
4. You may struggle with boundaries.
It can be difficult for empaths to set boundaries. For one thing, they want to help others, but they also don’t always know how to “turn off” their abilities. Richardson says this makes it particularly important for empaths to learn how to step into their observer or witnessing mind so they’re not always absorbing everything.
5. You can feel others’ emotions.
As psychologist and relationship expert Margaret Paul, Ph.D., tells mbg, one of the most fundamental aspects of empathy is feeling the emotions of others. Without someone even verbalizing that they’re upset, an empath can easily pick up on this because they suddenly start to feel it themselves, in their own body, she says.
6. You are overwhelmed by crowds.
For the empath who hasn’t mastered their protective mental bubble, being in a crowd is not a fun place to be. Not only are you picking up on the energy of individuals around you but the collective crowd as a whole and the overall energy of the physical space. That’s a lot!
7. You have to actively choose to not let energy in.
Does it feel difficult to block out the energy of others? That’s a sign of an empath, Richardson notes, adding that it’s so important for these people to learn how to mindfully tune out of others, which “is a skill you have to acquire and hone.”
8. You have always been sensitive, especially as a child.
Richardson notes that many empaths have always been empaths, often first showing signs of their acute sensitivity as a child.
However, it’s also possible for empaths to awaken to their gifts later in life. This can happen because when an empath is young and doesn’t understand their sensitivity, they may subconsciously shut it down to protect their own energy.
9. You are a natural helper or healer.
Empaths want to help alleviate others’ pain because they can feel in their own body, Paul notes. This makes them natural helpers or healers. Other people often recognize this quality in them and seek out empaths for help. “Being caring and compassionate might come naturally to you because you feel with people,” Richardson adds.
10. Physical spaces have a strong effect on you.
Empaths don’t just pick up the energy of people but even physical spaces as well. Richardson notes an empath will be very affected by particular spaces and how they’re maintained. This can be a good or bad thing, with a positive environment feeling very uplifting but a negative one feeling particularly suffocating.
11. You often feel isolated.
On a personal note, Paul notes that as an empath, she felt somewhat isolated as a child because she didn’t understand why everyone else didn’t have this sensitive ability that she did. Not only can it feel isolating to be an empath, but empaths are also known to isolate others when being around people becomes overwhelming.
12. You need time to recharge by yourself.
And last but not least, empaths are often introverts, needing ample time to recharge and restore their energy if they feel drained by others. This goes back to that tendency to isolate.
While there’s nothing wrong with giving yourself time to recharge, too much time alone can have a negative impact as well, making it important for empaths to learn how to protect their energy.
As Paul tells mbg, being an empath allows for a very deep connection with others. This can be a very powerful and positive thing. As Richardson adds, “Being able to feel the energies and emotions of other individuals, groups, and physical spaces is a wonderfully rich and intimate way to journey through life.”
Empaths bond deeply with others, can easily understand other people’s perspectives, and piggyback on other people’s good vibes or mood, she adds. Additionally, “being easily affected by energy means empaths can more mindfully create and curate the energy in their environment,” Richardson adds.
As aforementioned, Paul says she found it difficult as a child to be an empath, not understanding how people could be so cruel and inflict pain on others. Indeed, the visceral feelings that empaths experience around them make everything very intense, so the suffering in the world really affects them—because they can feel it too.
And as Richardson notes, empaths can also be more prone to people-pleasing and codependency since they can so intimately feel what others want, need, and expect. They’re also easily overwhelmed and overstimulated, which can make them feel anxious or drained.
That said, with a little intention and mindfulness, “the tricky parts of being an empath can be mitigated so you can truly enjoy your sensitivity and flourish,” Richardson adds.
The different types of empaths:
There are six different types of empaths, with the first and most common being an emotional empath. These people easily pick up (and take on) the emotions of those around them, whether the emotion is positive or negative.
Physical empaths are empaths who pick up on the physical symptoms of other people around them and even experience those symptoms within their own bodies. In some cases, physical empaths can also see where someone is experiencing a symptom.
Intuitive empaths have strong claircognizant abilities, with insight dropping into their minds instantaneously. As the name suggests, they have very strong intuition, and it’s particularly important for these people to learn how to manage their gift so they don’t become mentally, emotionally, or even physically overwhelmed.
Plants have their own sets of needs, and for the plant empath, they pick up on those needs easily. These folks make excellent gardeners or landscapers, knowing exactly how to tend to their plant friends. They enjoy time spent around plants, whether that’s out and about in nature, or around the plants they can tend to in gardens.
Animal empaths easily pick up on the needs and feelings of animals. These people have probably always had an affinity for animals, and it’s not unlikely that animals are drawn to them, too. Like the plant empath wants to be around plants, the animal empath enjoys the company of animals. They may even choose to work with animals, whether as veterinarian, at an animal shelter, etc.
Earth empaths, as the name suggests, are highly in tune with the Earth at large. It’s almost like a plant empath but on a much larger scale. They feel connected to all of nature and Mother Earth, and when natural disasters happen, they feel profoundly affected. They’re also very affected by the weather and are very sensitive to the environment being harmed.
Empaths vs. highly sensitive people.
Empaths and highly sensitive people (HSPs) are similar, but there is a little nuance. Highly sensitive people are exactly what they sound like by definition: very sensitive, namely to external stimuli. This isn’t unlike the sensitivity seen in empaths.
The simplest way to break it down is that empaths are highly sensitive people, but not all highly sensitive people are empaths. Unlike empaths, HSPs don’t necessarily absorb or take on the emotions and physical symptoms of others, though they will certainly be affected by the energy around them.
What to know about empaths in relationships.
Given the particular set of gifts empaths are equipped with, their relationships can be very deep—but also come with their own set of challenges.
As Richardson explains, empaths can have a hard time maintaining boundaries and will sometimes put their partner’s needs before their own. This can lead to them trying to manage their partner’s emotions or even withdraw from intimacy altogether, overwhelmed by how much the relationship affects them.
According to Richardson, this is why it’s particularly important for empaths to set emotional boundaries, avoid narcissists, and be mindful not to completely merge with their partner. (Check out her full guide to dating as an empath for more tips.)
And if you’re dating an empath yourself, remember that they have a unique experience when it comes to interacting with others, especially in a romantic setting.
If they need space or time to themselves, don’t take it personally. Being supportive means encouraging them to do their own thing, validating their experiences, and not taking advantage of their highly empathetic nature. They like their physical space to be comfortable and tidy, so take that into consideration, too.
Being an empath is incredibly powerful but can also feel incredibly overwhelming. The good news is, with awareness and a little practice, anyone can hone their abilities and learn how to “turn off” the bombardment of external energy when it gets to be too much. Ultimately, this keen sensitivity is a gift, allowing empaths to experience the world in a very attuned and astute way.
