6 Steps for Becoming More Resilient

We all encounter setbacks whether they are related to business, our families or our relationships. There’s simply no way around failure/heartache in our lives; negative experiences happen to the best of us. That’s why it’s critical to work on our resilience so that we can more easily move out from under the sting of those setbacks. Here are five tips for becoming more resilient in the face of adversity:

1. Use Your Communication and Problem-Solving Skills. When something negative happens, don’t assign your own meaning to it, or make any quick assumptions. Follow up with the parties involved to see if you can get some feedback about what happened. Ask questions and use that information to either turn the situation around, learn about yourself or do better the next time.
2. Accept Change. That dreaded word- change. It is uncomfortable and isn’t always what we wanted, but we must learn to welcome it. Strive to look at change as an opportunity to grow. If needed, refer back to previous situations where you went through something similar. Reflect on how you were able to overcome it that time, and how you can do the same this time as well. Call a friend to remind you if needed.
3. Become More Patient. Resilience goes hand in hand with patience. I know that patience is not (and has never been) one of my strengths. Still, I work on it all of the time. Try not to place a rigid dealine on your success, relationship outcomes, or goals. Things really do tend to work out when the timing is right. Until then, you can increase your patience by making yourself wait on things. For example, when you want to buy something new or have a second helping of dessert, pause first. Avoid making quick decisions, and also try to wait before speaking. Train yourself to consider your response thoroughly before responding. These small steps will help you increase your level of patience over time.
4. Reframe Your View. When stuck in a situation that you weren’t expecting, it’s helpful to reframe the event in a more positive way. Recognize your thoughts and fears associated with the experience by writing them down. This will help you to uncover any negative thinking and enable you to turn that thinking around. Then, regroup and brainstorm. What’s your contigency plan and how will you move forward from here?
5. Imagine Something Better. What’s now possible because of this setback? Where’s the silver lining? Perhaps your time has been freed up to do some of the other things that you’ve been neglecting. Maybe you now have the chance to go after an even bigger opportunity. Try to find the upside related to this setback and concentrate on all of the wonderful moments that are now possible as a result.
6. Get Unstuck and Focus. Do what you can to bring your energy back. Venture outside and get some fresh air, go for a run, spend some time with family and friends, or do something you love. Flip your mindset and accept yourself as you are. Tell yourself that you can overcome anything because you can!