August 21, 2021 — 12:04 PM
When you hear “soul mate,” does a romantic relationship come to mind? The truth is, there are many, many different soul connections you can have with all sorts of people, not all of which are marked by romance. Yes, platonic soul mates are a thing.
Defining the term “soul mate.”
“Soul mate” definitely comes with a heavy romantic connotation, but as professional intuitive Tanya Carroll Richardson previously explained to mbg, soul mates or “soul connections” are not always romantic.
“A soul connection is when two people feel they are linked on a soul level in a significant or extraordinary way,” she says, adding that the connection often seems to transcend the Earth plane. Whether you’re co-workers or lovers, she adds, those details don’t matter because “something much more brought you together or is at play.”
In any soul connection, romantic or otherwise, “your souls get each other,” psychotherapist Annette Nuñez, M.S., Ph.D., tells mbg. “You recognize that soul from a past life, and there’s just a deep, effortless connection.”
So, soul mates be platonic?
Yes, soul mates can be platonic. A platonic soul mate relationship is a friendship that goes virtually as deep as any friendship can. Nuñez explains these friendships won’t feel like other “normal” friendships but rather you are friends “at a soul level” and likely shared a profound and instant recognition upon first meeting.
And don’t underestimate the power these connections can have. According to Richardson, our platonic soul mates can be just as important in our lives as romantic soul mates. “If you think of earthly life as a temporary journey for the soul, as some spiritual people do, you’ll want to have interesting, supportive companions for the trip—just like any character in an epic story or legend picks up companions along the way,” she adds.
It’s also very possible (and even likely) that you’ll have more than one platonic soul mate throughout your life, and even more than one at the same time. “You can meet new soul mates all throughout your life. They don’t have to be a best friend from childhood—it could be someone from work or someone you meet in your 50s,” Nuñez says.
Richardson also notes that some soul mates come and go, and some are around for the long haul. Regardless of their duration, these connections are a fundamental part of the journey. “Just like the human body needs food and water, the soul requires companion soul mates,” she says.
9 signs you’ve found a platonic soul mate:
1. There was an instant recognition.
According to Nuñez, one telltale sign you’ve found a platonic soul mate is the instant recognition you feel when you meet them. “Your soul recognizes their soul,” she explains, adding that right away, you probably felt a deep connection to them. As Richardson adds, “You might feel you have known each other in a past life or that your souls agreed before this life to meet up now.”
2. You just “get” each other.
Along with having the instant recognition upon meeting, that recognition really never stops. Like kindred spirits, there is always a sense that the two of you just “get” or understand each other. Nuñez explains you will resonate with a platonic soul mate to the point that you feel comfortable with them no matter what. You are seen by them, they see you, and there is a mutual understanding that feels very uplifting.
3. The friendship is easy.
The mutual understanding that platonic soul mates so easily cultivate makes for an effortless friendship “where you click, and can even finish each other’s sentences,” Nuñez notes. She adds that these friendships are not hard, even in times when other friendships might struggle. Awkward silence? Not awkward for platonic soul mates! Heavy or serious conversations? Platonic soul mates handle them with ease.
4. The friendship is supportive.
Platonic soul mates are always in your corner, and the friendship offers you unwavering support. “Think of them as spiritual sidekicks,” Richardson explains, “people who seemed destined to be in your path so you both, in turn, can give each other love and encouragement when needed to keep going on your earthly odyssey.” As Nuñez adds, platonic soul mates share “a deep love that’s beyond family love.”
5. They help you to feel regulated.
The support these friendships provide goes beyond day-to-day trials and tribulations. Their presence alone helps to regulate you physically and emotionally, according to Nuñez, offering a feeling of calmness and being nurtured. While many more casual friendships are centered around having fun together, platonic soul mates are content just to be around each other and enjoy each other’s company.
6. Time and distance don’t matter.
Have you ever had a friend you can go long stretches of time without speaking to, and when you come back together you pick up right where you left off? That’s a good indicator of a platonic soul mate, Nuñez explains. With these friends, you can both come and go, not speak for years, live far apart, etc.—but once you connect again, you don’t miss a beat.
7. They helped you learn and grow.
The whole basis behind the idea of any soul connection is that you knew each other in a past life, with more business in each other’s lives this time around—and that holds true for platonic soul mates. “You resonate here on Earth to connect and finish whatever wasn’t resolved in a past life,” Nuñez explains, “so you’re there to make that connection to help the lesson run its course.”
8. They showed up at a particular time in your life.
Knowing these platonic soul connections help facilitate growth, they often show up right when you need them (even if you don’t realize it at the time). Nuñez says she believes the universe has a way of presenting us with the souls we need to encounter, exactly when we need to encounter them. “As you get older, you need that soul in your life to teach you a lesson,” she adds, and they always seem to arrive right on time.
And last but not least, thanks to the deep recognition and understanding shared by platonic soul mates, there is never any shame within these friendships. Nuñez explains the deep love shared between platonic soul mates mitigates that, and the support these friends offer each other comes without judgment and criticism. Even when they’re holding you accountable, a platonic soul mate will do so in a way that doesn’t make you feel bad about yourself.
Sure, finding a romantic soul mate sounds nice, but nothing can replace the beautiful friendships we’re all bound to make throughout our lives. So don’t forget about those platonic soul mates. These connections offer us support, understanding, and, above all, a deep recognition—and that’s something to celebrate.