An authentic you starts with realizing and aligning with your core values.
Authenticity means to be true to one’s character. It is about sharing your uniqueness with the world and living genuinely.
Presenting yourself authentically, especially in authority positions, can be a challenge at times. If you’re questioning your authenticity the answer can reside in how deeply you’re aligned with your core values.
When you live according to your principles, an authentic YOU emerges.
From time to time, it can be good practice to assess the principles we adhere to. This helps us preclude the challenge of conflicting values.
For instance, you value financial freedom and want to start your own business yet you also value quality time with your family. Starting a business could conflict with spending more time with your family.
Or, you value quality “me” time and desire to be more mindful. However, your favorite way to decompress after a hard day is watching TV or playing Candy Crush. See the conflict?
You value freedom and fulfillment, yet you work so hard to achieve it that you burn out instead. Thus, you never reach your intended goal.
Living authentically starts when you take the time to assess your core values. Only then is it possible to integrate your actions with your values. So what happens when your core values conflict? How do you fully express your authenticity? How do you choose your path?
Start by acknowledging the conflict that arises within…
Symptoms of conflicting core values
Paralysis
When these conflicts occur, you’ll find yourself uncertain as to which direction to take. This can result in paralysis and failure to take any action at all.
Misunderstandings
It’s difficult to convey your wishes when your values are conflicting. If you’re communicating two opposing desires, the message will be unclear and others are likely to misunderstand.
Overwhelm
You’re being pulled in opposing directions and attempting to satisfy more than one outcome simultaneously. The result can be chaos and overwhelm.
Strong Emotions
Your mind becomes a place of anxiety, doubt, stress and overload because you can’t decide which action is most authentic. Your constant questioning can bring up a lot of unfavorable emotions.
The occurrence of any of these symptoms may be the result of conflicting values. Changing the way you look at your ‘conflicting values’ releases associated stress and allows you to gain a more positive outlook. Adapting insight to your core values and how they affect your actions helps you grow into your authentic YOU.
Here are two steps to help you overcome conflicting values…
Step 1: Make sure your values serve you needs
The first step in eliminating internal conflict between opposing values is deciding whether or not any of these values serve you. Take a look at your needs and desires. How does each value benefit you? If you’re not holding onto a value to assist your self-development, it’s probably not one worth keeping. Remember that your values shape your authenticity and an authentic you paves the way for self-growth and inner power. If the value doesn’t reflect that, then it’s not cultivating your authenticity.
Step 2: Change the mindset and let one help the other
Most likely if you have two conflicting values, they are conflicting because you truly want both. Eliminating one may seem impossible.
Step 2 is all about your outlook and transforming your mindset to help one value assist the other. Let’s say you want to save some money. The value of supporting yourself financially is important to you. However you seek this value because you want to buy the things you desire, which creates a conflict between saving and spending.
What if you opened your mind to a different outlook on this ‘conflicting set of values’? These opposing objectives could support each other. You could adjust your budget allowing for both saving and spending simultaneously. Find the balance of planning your financial resources – save some for later while enjoying some now.
When you choose to look at one value as supporting the next, you eliminate the conflict. This change of mindset will free you of stress and self-doubt, because it will allow you to move towards mindfulness and clarity. With a clear mind, you’ll be able to experience more authentic decisions that support growth.
An authentic YOU starts with deep insight into your core values. When you’re feeling any sort of self-doubt, overwhelm, or stress, it might be a sign that your core values are conflicting. Start moving towards your authentic Self by extinguishing this internal conflict. Make sure your values serve your needs, then change your mindset to let these values support your personal growth.
