Love is complicated — and for some people, things get very messy.
Sure, falling in love with single people is ideal, but sometimes the Universe has other plans — and you’ll get no judgment from us on that front.
If you’re in one of these sticky situations, you may be asking yourself, “Will he leave his wife for me?”
After all, the connection and love between you are intense.
To help you make sense of it all, today, we’re exploring signs that signal whether he’ll leave his wife for you.
Will He Leave His Wife Statistics
Will a married man leave his wife? We won’t sugarcoat the issue. It’s a hard fact that most affairs don’t end up as marriages — and those that do often end in divorce.
Generally speaking, experts pin the current divorce rate at about 39%. And according to marriage statistics, only 3-5% of men marry their mistresses.
Unfortunately, most men simply want the excitement of an affair and have no intention of leaving their happy homes — especially if they have kids.
9 Signs He Will Leave His Wife for You
Do married men leave their wives?
Statistically speaking, most affairs don’t end in marriage.
But “most” isn’t “always.” Every once in a blue moon, the mistress does become the wife.
Are you headed in that direction? Maybe so if the nine signs below characterize your relationship.
1. He Spends More Time With You Than His Wife
If you’re at a point where he spends more time with you than his wife, it bodes well for the future of your relationship.
However, don’t look through rose-colored glasses. If you only see him once or twice a week, he’s likely spending more time with his spouse than you — even if he says otherwise.
2. He Cares About Your Feelings
When a guy is primarily interested in the physical aspects of a relationship, he’s usually not fretting over your feelings. As harsh as it may sound, he may not even care.
But if he’s invested in your goals, hurdles, and how you feel, there’s a good chance he sees you as more than just a disposable fling.
3. He Doesn’t Hide You
Have you met some of his friends? Is he bold about being seen with you in public? If so, that means he’s not trying to hide you. And if that’s the case, he’s more likely to leave his wife.
Some people have open relationships, though. So don’t mistake an allowable parameter for increased affection.
4. He Messages You When His Wife Is Around
Does he risk messaging and calling you when his wife is around? If so, he probably isn’t too concerned with keeping you a secret. Plus, being at this point indicates that his wife likely knows about you.
5. He Talks About Your Future Together
Does he talk about a future that involves you and him? It’s a spectacular sign if he does. Men who are only concerned with the sexual perks of an affair won’t say a word about what’s in store down the line.
But it must come naturally from him. Coaxing him into pillow talk about the future isn’t the same as him voluntarily bringing it up over dinner.
6. He Talks to You About His Marriage
Does he open up to you about his marriage in a meaningful way? If so, it may indicate that he’s ready to leave his partnership behind and start anew with you. But try not to confuse immature complaints with a true heart-to-heart.
7. He Shows Up for You
Does he acknowledge, support, and respect whatever is going on in your life — whether work-related or personal?
Is he there for you, in some capacity, when the rubber meets the road? Guys preparing to leave their current relationship will have your back.
8. He Always Makes Plans for Your Next Meetup
When will you see him next? Is it a sporadic arrangement, or do you make reliable plans regularly?
If you’re still in the “see you when I see you” phase, don’t hold your breath about him leaving his current marriage. When men genuinely want to be with you, they will respect your time.
9. He Openly Talks About Divorce
Openly talking about divorce is another sign that he’s ready to make a move.
However, some men will string women along with the promise of divorce when they have no intentions of filing. Try not to ignore your gut; it’s got a good scam radar.
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9 Signs He Won’t Leave His Wife
While there are always exceptions to the rule, most affairs don’t end up filed in the happily-ever-after folder. So what are the signs that he probably won’t leave his wife for you?
1. He’s Told You So
Believe him if he flat out says he has no intentions of breaking up with his spouse or partner! Don’t trick yourself into thinking you can change his mind. Doing that is just setting yourself up for disappointment.
In these cases, no matter how much you think you love him, try to end the relationship. We promise you it’s a waste of time that can only end in tears and trauma. Save yourself the headaches.
2. He Talks Lovingly About His Current Wife
You want to believe that he can love two women simultaneously. And who knows, maybe he can.
But if that’s the case, there’s no reason for him to leave his wife. If he loves her, he will stay married to her — especially if he can keep you on the side as well.
3. He Doesn’t Prioritize You
Are you an afterthought in his world? Is he always in control of when and where you see each other? Does he keep you tucked away?
Answering yes to any of these questions is not a good sign. If he only sees you as a fling, he likely doesn’t respect you or the relationship.
4. He’s Sporadic
Do you see him regularly, or are you sitting by your phone, waiting for him to call or send a message? If it’s the latter, temper your expectations about the relationship going anywhere near serious.
5. You’re Not His Only Lover
Are you one of many? When you broach the topic, does he dance around the issue? Does he get mad that you’d even ask? If he has a harem of women, don’t elevate your hopes.
6. He Keeps Postponing Divorce
He swears he’s getting a divorce, but something comes up every time it’s supposed to happen, and it must be postponed. If this happens more than once, he’s likely scamming you and has no intention of ending his marriage!
7. Your Relationship Is Mostly a Secret
If your relationship is still a big secret, don’t hold your breath. He won’t hide you if he loves you enough to leave his marriage.
One time out on the town is nice, but if it’s not a regular occurrence, the relationship may not be at the level you want it to be.
8. He’s Dishonest With You
Liars aren’t worth it! Stop giving him chances if he’s constantly telling you half-truths to weasel out of things. There’s someone better out there who will respect you.
9. He’s Had Affairs in the Past
Does he have a pattern of infidelity? Is he a serial philanderer? If so, the chances of him leaving his wife for you are between slim and none. Instead, he’ll simply find a new mistress.
How To Get a Married Man To Leave His Wife
Ultimately, you cannot make another person fall in love with you. If it’s meant to be, it will find a way. However, some behaviors are more conducive to a smooth mistress-to-wife transition.
- Give Him Space: Clinginess is a major turn-off. So give him space if you want him to fall head over heels for you. Let him know that you’re fitting him into your life and not the other way around.
- Be Loyal: Loyalty goes a long way. If he asks you to keep secrets, do it. Also, say what you mean and mean what you say. Men are more likely to commit to women they trust.
- Look Your Best: Healthy relationships are about more than outward appearances. However, for better or worse, attraction plays a role. With that in mind, it may help to look your best when with him.
- Stay Away From His Wife and Kids: Whatever you do, stay away from his wife and children — both online and off. Let him decide where and when you meet the people in his life.
- Be Yourself: The success of a relationship depends on the parties involved, and people who play a role instead of being themselves typically don’t have as much luck. The goal is to find someone who adores you for you.
How Long To Wait for a Married Man To Leave
You’re blissfully in love — euphoric, even. But he’s married, and you’re unsure if you two have a future. Will he leave his wife, or won’t he? Should you give him an ultimatum?
The choice is yours. But remember that only about 3% of men leave their wives for their mistress — and ultimatums have a tendency to explode.
So, if it’s been over a year, and your routine hasn’t changed in months, you may want to consider finding someone who’s available.
Did you just scream, “Yeah, except he won’t leave his wife but won’t let me go, either!” It may not feel like you have control over the relationship in these situations, but you do.
Decide what you want, then stick to your guns! It’s not fair of him to have his cake and eat it too — especially if you’re stuck sneaking around.
Dating a married man isn’t ideal. But sometimes, soulmates show up in inconvenient forms. Do your best to be true to yourself and respectful of everyone involved, circumstances allowing.