What do we do after we are dumped? Most of us hit the local supermarket for a gallon or two of double-chocolate fudge ice cream and tuck ourselves into the couch for a week or two and watch reruns of Downtown Abby. I still have the chocolate stains on my sofa cushion. It always hurts,…
Dating is hard! Add in a pandemic and then anxiety, and it can become crippling. It can cause some people to give up and not want to even try dating anymore. But if you are seeking a relationship, it is definitely worth it! In this post, I will share some things I learned through creating…
“Why am I the only one working on this relationship?” “What else am I supposed to do if my partner won’t meet me halfway?” “I can’t do this dance on my own!” If any of these questions resonate, you are not alone. You might feel stuck in situations where you see problems and want to…
Sometimes, the right thing to do when your relationship feels off track is to check in on yourself. Dr. Gottman recommends that you take some time to be “selfish.” If that word feels funny to you, think of it as investing in you. Our research found that taking care of yourself helps your relationship grow…
The notion of “good” and “bad” children is deeply ingrained in society. People can be quick to name personality traits and behaviors that make a child “good” or “bad.” However, these labels often come as a result of adults not having enough understanding of brain development, how children process information, how they learn, and how…
Have you been attempting to control your partner without realizing it? Have you ever justified taking on your partner’s emotional, relational, financial, or logistical responsibilities with: “I can do it better and/or more quickly, so I might as well just do it myself.” “They aren’t making it a priority, so I have to do the…
Undefinable and indescribable If you’ll suffer with me as I attempt to define and describe for you what has seemingly become the undefinable and the indescribable that is….. ‘RELATIONSHIP. Nothing tangible, sometimes not even our health, is left when we’ve lost everything. Relationships are all we have left. What is the purpose of life if not a…
Relationship conflict is complex. Sometimes, conflicts are only about the “here and now” issue. That means that you are truly fighting about what you are fighting about. It’s “I left your favorite creamer out, it spoiled, no coffee, and now you are upset with me.” It doesn’t go much deeper than that. This type of…
What level of involvement do you have in the relationship? How involved are you in your personal relationships? What level of involvement do you have in the relationship? I’m not referring to being physically present, because that is a given. I’m referring to the fact of being cognitively, emotionally, and spiritually invested in your romantic partner.…
It may surprise you to learn that happier couples do not argue less than unhappy couples. What distinguishes the two groups is that happy couples repair during and after a fight, whereas in unhappy relationships, partners tend to escalate negativity by using criticism, contempt, defensive, and stonewalling (The Four Horsemen). Repairs are ways to tap…
